ok the subject im on right now is about your first blog on here and the one u said about Alina... first off I never once said that I didnt love her or even thought it at all and honestly as long as she's happy then im fine but if something bothers her i ask no matter what it is now because i wanna know the truth in everything and i speak only the truth now....

Second thing how did i even mess with you like that???? i didnt and ur gonna try to throw me another guilt trip -.- dont start this back up again its something thats over and done with...

Third thing i've even said that the day i broke up with her is a day i will always regret plus i still remember the day we met and the day we got together if you wanna know those days.... we met on Feb/09/2009 got together on Feb/10/2009 so dont try anything with me anymore i still care for her and i always will...

Last thing I didn't give up on her....i gave up on myself and i know it so dont try to hold anything against me anymore like i've said if Alina does want me back she would ask me because after what i did im too scared to even ask because i dont think i honestly deserve it...so honestly idk and ive changed alot....and i cant help it....

thats all i have to say on this...

right now it feels as if ive become nobody and i dont make a difference to anything or anyone, i havent been sleeping well these past few days and nightmares have been ravaging my dreams...shit i actually cant remember last time ive had anything good happen to me...i dont even really know whos all left for me anymore i havent been able to talk to anyone for almost a month so yeah im kinda reverting back into being a loner idk when the next time is that ill be able to get on a comp but eh its w.e with me now cus honestly comps have really taken over my life now that i think about it and deep down im trapped in a corner with no other defense then as of to just ignore everything in my life and i dont care what happens anymore really because the way that i look at it now i dont have much to lose honestly...most of my friends are gone or dont even care and ppl that are still there for me are slowly fading away and i know it yet i dont say a thing to em because once i fade i dont wanna ever come back from the darkness....

idc if you like me or not i just dont fucking care anymore Luke or whoever the fuck you are cus i know thats not your real name.....i know this from going back through conversations we've had and no guy i know of has ever cried out of frustration only females i know have not even myself have cried out of frustration so tell me who you are and what the fuck your real intentions where im tired of playing this fucking game i want to get to the end of it....so go ahead hate me...despise me...cast me into the shadows like everyone else did and btw im not the reason alina left xanga look at what the fuck you did taking parts of my messages and sending them to alina if i have anything to say about it id say its more your fault she left then anything you got her crying bad cus of that shit....SO WHY DONT YOU JUST TELL ME THE FUCKING TRUTH?! ADMIT IT YOU CANT HIDE ANYMORE I WANNA KNOW WHO YOU REALLY ARE!!! hate me or despise me cus of this i dont give a shit just know that i know alot more about you then you think and this is only the beginning if you wanna start fucking with me you wanna start fucking with me ima fuck you over.....im done with this childish act stop hiding behind fake pictures that arent you and faking your whole lifestyle get a fucking grip on reality oh and btw yeah theres alot more then just that that i know about you and i never asked anyone a thing about it so tell me this if you have to ask people stuff about me and i can go back and look at conversations and figure this out tell me whats the point of trying to hide anymore?........hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe good bye for now ill b back soon and unless you want me to tear your dignity to shreds ull tell me the truth.......